menses...why do you give me so much trouble?

finally. it's here. my period. it was late...and when it's late, it's bad news for me and those around me. i normally PMS hard, but when it's late, i PMS ferociously. i become a little hyper sensitive, so i'm either on the verge of crying or getting angry at someone. the physical pain is not an issue. in fact, i enjoy my cramps. they are comforting. it's the emotional part that i hate. sometimes i think it'd be great if I could sleep through the pms and wake up when I got the bloody thing (no pun intended).

don't get me wrong. i love my period. after almost a decade of birth control pills controlling my body's natural flow, i was so happy and relieved to get my first post-pill period. it was painfully lovely. cramps. lots of blood. and real. real. real.

but it took a while for my period to "normalize". this meant that i was irregular for a while. i was told i had PCOS (poli-cystic ovarian syndrome) but a stupid (white male) doctor who diagnosed me with it since, according to him, "many Indian and Middle Eastern women" had it, and i'd displayed "some" of the symptoms (i.e. only 2 out of the myriad symptoms). at first, his diagnosis seriously affected me emotionally. he told me there was a chance PCOS led to infertility. needless to say, i was upset. but (due to previous experiences with chump western medicine docs) i decided to call up my homeopath, who gave me a remedy and regularized my period in no time.

for the most part, my period has been regular for some time now. there are the rare occasions when it's late...maybe because of stress, travelling, change in diet, or whatever. but the one thing that's given me trouble has been my pre-menstrual mood swings. i'm already a moody person to begin with, but the hormonal shifts really bring out the bitch in me. i can also become the most hyper sensitive person, and consequently, my insecurities seem to get the best of me at such times. perhaps i need to see the homeopath again. maybe take some remedies. or maybe there are dietary changes, vitamins or herbs i should take throughout the month. speaking of herbs, maybe i need to just smoke some la and chill the f&*k out.

sigh.

whatever. whatever.

maybe i'm not the only chick out there with menses troubles. i'm guessing not.